“I don’t like that term, “playing the victim.” I think that it’s important to keep our oppressions in context and be aware of how they can fuck over our lives, and I think it’s important to fight those oppressions so they don’t fuck over other people. Trauma and mental illness are awful, and it’s a definite learning experience to be able to process and heal and cope with them in healthy ways, and I understand if some folks have trouble getting out of those dark places; I can relate. People need to do what’s best for them. But I don’t think that that should mean ignoring other people’s feelings and needs. I don’t think that that should mean shunning decency or responsibility for your actions just because you’re having a rough time. Respect, folks. Right now I’m learning to respect myself and all of the friends from whom I’ve asked and expected too much. I hope that adopting and maintaining this mentality will help to supplement all of the other ways in which I’m trying to take care of myself. I really want to grow. I want to be strong and fair and reasonable. I want to be a good person.”

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I did the dishes while you read out loud this is how i feel lately. i am trying to learn to accept help when offered, ask for help when i need it, but most of all, i am trying to learn to understand what i need to do to feel grounded and get to a point where i can look after myself. self care is complicated, and it seems few of us are good at it automatically.